My submitted entry has the person saying,
“Would it help if I went to work for Bain Capital?”
October Caption Contest Entry
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Monthly Archives: October 2012
Before We Had Cold Activated Beer Cans
Reverse Engineer Create Table Schema for Sybase or SQL Server
QUESTION: Is there any way to fetch the create table schema including the textual representation of actual Sybase datatypes (instead of the number)?
ANSWER: Yes
Pretty In ………… Yellow?
Joanne and Richard were expecting a baby soon. They knew this was going to be their last baby. Even though they secretly wanted a boy, they did not want to know the sex of the newborn.
Consequently they decorated the baby’s room completely in a neutral color … yes you guessed it… yellow.
Well this frustrated the grandparents to no end. They had heard myths about yellow being a depressing color or making babies angry.
When the baby was born and to the parent’s delight, it was a boy they named Jason.
No more than one hour went by after the birth when the grandparents rushed out and bought everything baby-related they could find. In the color blue.
Steak Lovers Stand Your Ground
Stacy has been making sure she and her husband, Jim, eat healthy. For Jim’s birthday, Stacy decided to take Jim out to dinner for the best steak in town.
Inside the restaurant, Jim and Stacy immediately noticed all the deer and antelope heads mounted on the walls.
When it was the couple’s turn, the hostess asked Stacy where she wanted to sit. She replied, “Somewhere where we won’t be stared at.”
Sybase Query Analyzer – showplan
QUESTION:
I’m querying Sybase database from C# code. Is there any good query analyzer to understand the exact queries being generated like the Query Analyzer for Sql Server?
ANSWER:
You can set some Sybase variables to see the Query Plan such as the following:
set showplan on
set statistics io on
set statistics time on
exec my_proc (my_arg1, my_arg2, ...)
go
I have put this into a shell script to pass the command line arguments including stored procedure name and parameters.
isql -Uxxx -Pyyy <<-_EOF_
set showplan on
set statistics io on
set statistics time on
exec $*
go
_EOF_You use this to see if there are any table scans which should be avoided at all costs.
Good SQL, good night.
Sweat Equity
My wife spends the evening slaving over a hot stove to prepare a special chicken dish for a company potluck.
At the potluck, Jeff says, “This chicken dish is really good. What is in it?”
I respond, “Sweat.”
To which Jeff responds, “Yummm. Sweat.”
Michael E Kelley 