Spoiling babies

Do we have to buy a different colored tablet to match every baby outfit?

tablet_babyI ask you. Will this kid think this picture is funny in 20 years?

Who let this kid play in Mom’s and Dad’s bed?

Captain Kirk Saves Oscars

Trekkies had a lot to celebrate during the Academy Awards.

oscar

Captain Kirk went back in time to 2013 to help Seth McFarlane clean up his act.

The Captain spent 20 minutes giving Seth tips for the show which included several classic song and dance numbers with Seth and other stars.

A special tribute to James Bond movies was well received.

By the end of the night, the big winners were “Life of Pi”, “Argo”, Daniel Day-Lewis and Jennifer Lawrence.

So Trekkies and Engineers everywhere were celebrating what they have known all along: the importance of Pi.

A special appearance by Michelle Obama and her bangs to announce the Best Picture, “Argo”, was also smashing.

Engineers Make Lousy Husbands

An engineer is trained to think about all the possibilities for a system problem.  Whether it is a hardware or software system, all the reasons for a hiccup or failure must be identified in order to resolve the problem.  This results in several hypotheses and explanations.

rock_climber

While engineers may be great problem solvers, they fail to get a grip on how to communicate.

When an engineer tackles one of life’s problems, many possible solutions are examined.  Like which do you do first – pay the bills, buy groceries or fix the garden?  And in what order do you perform the rest of these tasks?  An engineer would give several action plans and reasons for each.

But a wife thinks a lot differently than an engineer.  In fact a woman will want one and only one answer to a question or issue or she will begin to distrust the husband.

So try to imagine being an engineer AND a husband.  What a conundrum.

She gets upset when he gives her more than one answer and then he gets frustrated when he realizes he should have stuck with the first answer.  Talk about being up the creek without a paddle.  Oy vey!

Snacks Are Good For Kids As Well As Parents

Okay.  I know what you are thinking.  What a stupid, ignorant thing to say.

I know some snacks are awful but read what I have to say.

popcorn

I was in my optometrist’s office the other day.  She comes in fretting about her kids saying, “I worry about them.”

I told her, “Kids are pretty resilient.  Let me make a suggestion which goes against all normal thinking.”

Now I have her attention.

“Snacks are a good thing.”

She looks at me funny.

“I know what you are thinking but if you buy good snacks, they will come.  What I mean is your kids will hang around your house and you will get to know their friends.  And if you know their friends, you will know what they are doing.  As opposed to them off with their friends and you not knowing what they are up to.  This makes for good kids.”

“Wow, that makes sense.” she replies.

“And you can buy 100% juice drinks, whole grain chips and carrots with ranch dressing.”

“Thanks.” she replies.

I hope to hear in a few years that it worked out for her.  And maybe she won’t have as many worry lines on her forehead as I do.

Death To Identity Thief

No I am not talking about the movie.  But this will give you a run for your money.

identitytheft

Have you noticed that the keywords “death” and “dead” are the most popular?

At first I thought it was part of a “goth” or “freddy” or maybe “scissorhand” fetish for the horror movie genre.  You know.  Just like the Star Trek has Trekkies, I thought these were Deathies.

But then at 3 AM in the middle of the night I sat up in bed and realized, these are hackers. They are looking for obituaries.  And why would they do that?  To find identities to steal! 

How many people are going to realize that their identity was stolen if they are dead?

Let me put this another way.  Which is the least likely demographic to object and retaliate for identity theft?  Right.  Dead people.

This has been a community service announcement.

Oh, by the way, the Identity Thief movie is pretty good.

STEM The Tide of Illiteracy

Ride the technology wave.

ride-wave

The U.S. needs more people with skills in …STEM

 

 

 

 

 

 

We can do this.  To make these…

robot 

If you like magic or mystery you will like STEM.science

Summary of Obama’s 2013 State of the Union Address

First, the winner of the evening: pastel ties.

stateofunion2013

Now the goals. [Responsibility Key: C-Congress A-Administration S-States E-Everybody]

  • Put the nation’s interests before party. (C)
  • Cut deficit by $1.5 trillion. (C)
  • Embrace the need for modest reforms (to) our retirement programs. (C)
  • Enact Medicare reforms proposed by the bipartisan Simpson-Bowles commission. (C)
  • Reduce taxpayer subsidies to prescription drug companies. (C)
  • Ask more from the wealthiest seniors. (C)
  • Base medical bills on the quality of care that our seniors receive. (C)
  • Get rid of tax loopholes and deductions for the well-off and well-connected. (C)
  • Pass a budget that replaces reckless cuts with smart savings and wise investments in our future. (C)
  • Ask ourselves three questions as a nation every day: (E)
    • How do we attract more jobs to our shores?
    • How do we equip our people with the skills needed to do those jobs?
    • And how do we make sure that hard work leads to a decent living?
  • Pass the rest of the American Jobs Act to create more than one million new jobs. (C)
  • Create a smarter government that sets priorities and invests in broad-based growth. (C)
  • Make America a magnet for new jobs and manufacturing. (E )
  • Launch of three more manufacturing hubs, state-of-the art labs (A)
    • Where new workers are mastering new technologies
    • Where businesses will partner with the Departments of Defense and Energy and
    • Where regions turn into global centers of high-tech jobs.
  • Create a network of fifteen of these hubs and guarantee that the next revolution in manufacturing is Made in America. (C)
  • Reach a level of research and development not seen since the height of the Space Race. (C)
  • Pursue a bipartisan, market-based solution to climate change. (C)
  • Generate even more Wind energy. (E)
  • Drive costs down even further for Solar energy. (E)
  • Keep cutting red tape and speeding up new oil and gas permits. (A)
  • Encourage research and technology that helps natural gas burn even cleaner and protects our air and water. (C)
  • Use some of our oil and gas revenues to fund an Energy Security Trust that will drive new research and technology to shift our cars and trucks off oil for good. (C)
  • Free our families and businesses from the painful spikes in gas prices we’ve put up with for far too long. (C)
  • Cut in half the energy wasted by our homes and businesses over the next twenty years. (C)
  • Give federal support to states with the best ideas to create jobs and lower energy bills by constructing more efficient buildings. (C)
  • Upgrade our infrastructure, so they’ll bring even more jobs. (C)
  • Start a “Fix-It-First” program to put people to work as soon as possible on our most urgent (infrastructure) repairs. (C)
  • Create a Partnership to Rebuild America that attracts private capital to upgrade what our businesses need most: (C)
    • Modern ports to move our goods;
    • Modern pipelines to withstand a storm; and
    • Modern schools worthy of our children.
  • Pass a bill that would give every responsible homeowner in America the chance to save $3,000 a year by refinancing at today’s rates. (C)
  • Streamline the home buying process, and help our economy grow. (A)
  • Equip our citizens with the skills and training to fill those jobs. (E)
  • Work with states to make high-quality preschool available to every child in America. (A)
  • Give every American student opportunities like graduating their high school with the equivalent of a technical degree from one of our community colleges. (S)
  • Reward schools that (C)
    • Develop new partnerships with colleges and employers, and
    • Create classes that focus on science, technology, engineering, and math.
  • Change the Higher Education Act, so that affordability and value are included in determining which colleges receive certain types of federal aid. (C)
  • Release a new “College Scorecard” that parents and students can use to compare schools based on the most bang for your educational buck. (A)
  • Put more boots on the southern border. (A)
  • Establish a responsible pathway to earned citizenship. (C)
  • Fix the legal immigration system (C) to
    • Cut waiting periods,
    • Reduce bureaucracy, and
    • Attract the highly skilled entrepreneurs and engineers.
  • Send me a comprehensive immigration reform bill in the next few months. (C)
  • Pass the Violence Against Women Act. (C)
  • Declare that women should earn a living equal to their efforts, and pass the Paycheck Fairness Act this year. (C)
  • Raise the federal minimum wage to $9.00 an hour. (C)
  • Tie the minimum wage to the cost of living. (C)
  • Offer incentives to companies that hire Americans who’ve got what it takes to fill that job opening, but have been out of work so long that no one will give them a chance. (C)
  • Put people back to work rebuilding vacant homes in run-down neighborhoods. (C)
  • Partner with 20 of the hardest-hit towns in America to get these communities back on their feet. (A)
  • Work with local leaders to target resources at public safety, education, and housing. (A)
  • Give new tax credits to businesses that hire and invest. (C)
  • Work to strengthen families (C) by
    • Removing the financial deterrents to marriage for low-income couples, and
    • Doing more to encourage fatherhood.
  • Bring another 34,000 American troops come home from Afghanistan. (A)
  • Negotiate an agreement with the Afghan government that focuses on two missions (C) :
    • Training and equipping Afghan forces and
    • Supporting counterterrorism efforts.
  • Help countries like Yemen, Libya, and Somalia provide for their own security (C).
  • Help allies who take the fight to terrorists, as we have in Mali. (C)
  • Take direct action against those terrorists who pose the gravest threat to Americans. (C)
  • Forge a durable legal and policy framework to guide our counterterrorism operations. (A)
  • Ensure that our targeting, detention, and prosecution of terrorists remains consistent with our laws and system of checks and balances. (A)
  • Ensure that our efforts are even more transparent to the American people and to the world. (A)
  • Lead the effort to prevent the spread of the world’s most dangerous weapons. (C)
  • Stand by our allies, strengthen our own missile defense, and lead the world in taking firm action in response to these (North Korean) threats. (C)
  • Do what is necessary to prevent them (Iran) from getting a nuclear weapon. (C)
  • Engage Russia to seek further reductions in our nuclear arsenals. (A)
  • Lead the global effort to secure nuclear materials that could fall into the wrong hands. (A)
  • Face the rapidly growing threat from cyber-attacks. (A)
  • Strengthen our cyber defenses (A) by
    • Increasing information sharing, and
    • Developing standards to protect our national security, our jobs, and our privacy.
  • Give our government a greater capacity to secure our networks and deter attacks. (C)
  • Complete negotiations on a Trans-Pacific Partnership. (A)
  • Launch talks on a comprehensive Transatlantic Trade and Investment Partnership with the European Union. (A)
  • Join with our allies to eradicate such extreme poverty in the next two decades (A):
    • By connecting more people to the global economy and empowering women;
    • By giving our young and brightest minds new opportunities to serve and helping communities to feed, power, and educate themselves;
    • By saving the world’s children from preventable deaths; and
    • By realizing the promise of an AIDS-free generation.
  • Remain the anchor of strong alliances (A)
    • From the Americas to Africa;
    • From Europe to Asia
    • In the Middle East.
  • Stand with citizens as they demand their universal rights, and support stable transitions to democracy. (A)
  • Do not dictate the course of change in countries like Egypt. (A)
  • Insist on respect for the fundamental rights of all people. (A)
  • Keep the pressure on a Syrian regime that has murdered its own people. (A)
  • Support opposition leaders that respect the rights of every Syrian. (A)
  • Stand steadfast with Israel in pursuit of security and a lasting peace. (C)
  • Do whatever we must to protect those who serve their country abroad. (C)
  • Maintain the best military in the world. (C)
  • Invest in new capabilities, even as we reduce waste and wartime spending. (C)
  • Ensure equal treatment for all service members, and equal benefits for their families – gay and straight. (C)
  • Draw upon the courage and skills of our sisters and daughters. (E)
  • Give our veterans the benefits, education, and job opportunities they have earned. (C)
  • Do our part to make sure our God-given rights are protected here at home. (C)
  • Announce a non-partisan commission to improve the voting experience in America. (A)
  • Protect our most precious resource: our children. (E)
  • Reduce gun violence (C) by
    • Adding background checks
    • Sign tough new laws to prevent anyone from buying guns for resale to criminals.
    • Get weapons of war and massive ammunition magazines off our streets.
  • Make what difference we can, to secure this nation, expand opportunity, and uphold our ideals through the hard, often frustrating, but absolutely necessary work of self-government. (C)
  • Look out for our fellow Americans the same way they look out for one another, every single day, usually without fanfare, all across this country. (E)

Whew!  We have some work to do.

New Monopoly Piece Is The Cat’s Meow And Cat’s Pajamas At Same Time

Talk about your day of reckoning.  All the Cat-loving Dog-hating people have finally got their way.  [Okay.  I am sure there are a few Cat-loving Dog-loving people out there.  Will you please stand up?]  

monopoly_cat 

Since the game of Monopoly was first sold over a hundred years ago, there has been a Dog albeit a Scottish Terrier.  But there has never been a Cat – until today.

A Monopoly contest was held this past month and a new piece was chosen.

Cat-lovers are ecstatic. 

Some protagonists can hardly wait for the day when the Cat and the Dog end up on the same Monopoly board square.

But the same contest chose a loser.  Yes the much maligned and hardly used Iron piece was chosen for the dumpster.  Nobody liked ironing anyways.

Setting My Watch At Snack Time

I used to go to work and leave my watch at home.

watch

Recently one of our employees named Steve retired.  He was a fairly skinny guy. Boy did he have a busy schedule before he left us.

He had peanuts at 10 AM.  Then potato chips at 1 PM and finally an Ice Cream bar at 3 PM.  This was on top of his lunch at noon. 

He added credence to the idea that you will NOT gain weight if you eat a lot of small meals.

popcorn

A long time ago I worked on the West Coast Shuttle effort.  A lot of my time was spent in the same building with the Operations Maintenance Documentation (OMD) Group.  I liked to call it the OMG department because at exactly 2 PM one of the large data entry personnel would pop a bag of popcorn.  OMG!  The smell of popcorn would permeate the whole building.

My point is those snack times allowed me to either set my watch at 2 PM every day or just leave my watch at home.  But alas those were the good ole’ days.

Why Are We Possessed With Zombies and The Dead?

The IMDb database for movies and television shows has 840 shows just for zombies and 6779 shows involving death.

zombie

“HELP!  I can’t watch all those shows by myself!”

Could anyone but Leonard Maltin possibly watch all of them?

Even angels appear in only 357 shows and a fairy in only 140.  I am paraphrasing but Woody Allen said the only constant was death and taxes. Despite that taxes are only found in 151 shows. 

Looks like nobody got over the excitement, fear, and anxiousness of mysterious creatures under our beds and in our closets when we were kids.  Mercer Mayer and his children’s books involving the little Monsters made Monsters seem fun.

Now we can’t get enough of them.

My all time favorite show is Zombieland with Woody Harrelson. That is the one with a zillion Twinkies.

twinkies

The thought of Zombies after every Twinkie purchase is probably what killed Hostess.

May every Twinkie and Zombie die or live in peace.