Customer satisfaction is of high importance.
What is your favorite caption for this photo?
1. Mardi gras is just around the corner.
2. The African maker of this mask might have been a skinny guy.
3. I wonder if the mask maker hoped his mask would be worth $500,000.
4. The stick is another $10,000.
Enjoy!
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Another career on the line! Robot palm reader.
What is your favorite caption for this photo?
1. Your palm says you will live long life and then die.
2. Stop it! Ticklish I am.
3. You will have 3 <click> thousand <click> kids. Sorry. No thousand.
4. Who does your nails?
Enjoy!
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Can you tell which is the oldest twin?
What is your favorite caption for this photo?
1. I am the oldest so I get to eat first.
2. But I ate last, last time.
3. Oh yeah, well I can sing for my food.
4. That is not fair. I am the dancer of the family and now I am stuck in this chair.
Enjoy!
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Peek-a-boo!
What is your favorite caption for this photo?
1. Some people can’t wait for the previous showing to end.
2. Is the Queen in there?
3. They never give you enough time for a decent theatre potty break.
4. Holy crap! Darth Vader is the father!
Enjoy!
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Do you have a daughter whose bedroom floor is a mine field?
Well, you are not alone.
My wife and I were fed up with stepping on toys and papers in our daughter’s bedroom. We stood over her while she cleaned it up.
But a week or so later, we found her room in the same condition. This time we warned our daughter that we were serious and the next time we would confiscate everything that we found on the floor.
Her behavior did not change.
So the third time came and my wife and I scooped up everything into a big box and put it in the master bedroom.
Our daughter let out the loudest and longest cry. It was the biggest fake cry I have ever heard, even to this day.
For fear of losing all her stuff, she begged us to give it back. She made a long list of promises.
A day later I walked her to her room and whispered that if she just pushed her things under the bed or into the closet, so they were out of sight, we would not have a problem.
When our daughter once again promised to keep her room clean, we gave her back the box of her belongings. From that day forward, her room looked a lot better. There was stuff under the bed and in the closet, but we could walk around the room without stepping on anything.
Everyone lived happily ever after.
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Stress can really be a bummer. Be glad that you are not this guy.
Pick your favorite caption for this Monk.
1. I thought Monks only prayed all day. Boy was I wrong.
2. Are you sure these knives have not been sharpened in 5 years?
3. Next time I will wear a shirt.
4. Forget that. Next time I will wear a Kevlar bullet-proof vest.
Enjoy!
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Communication is so important.
What is the sculpture saying in this photo?
1. Are you talkin’ to me?
2. I don’t even know your name.
3. You will have to get your own toga. It’s cold in here.
4. If you are trying to tickle me, it won’t work.
Enjoy!
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Ever feel left behind?
Select your favorite caption for this photo.
1. Hey, guys. Was it something I said?
2. Are we there yet?
3. Do we have some time to stop for fast food?
4. Can I get a break here? A potty break?
Enjoy!
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When you just gotta have the latest fashion.
Select your favorite text message.
1. MOM: You have exceeded your fashion budget.
2. AMAZON: Your Zebra has been backordered. Thanks for shopping with us.
3. BILL MURRAY: My Stripes movie was funnier.
4. VOGUE: FLASH! Stripes are out. Plaids are in!
Enjoy!
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Ever feel like the entire world is against you?
This is what this warrior might say.
1. Should have bought that shield when I had the chance.
2. I love the outdoors.
3. Crap. Is there an off switch?
4. Does the “Well-Compensated Establishment Provocateur” have days like this?
Enjoy!
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Michael E Kelley 